Verse 1:
I‘m a good old lad,
never tryin‘ to be bad.
I fin‘lly met a nice girl
and want to marry her!
She insists on this „bling“,
that purity ring -
to save herself for
my chaste thing!
She gives me this ring
and said, „Let’s wear this thing!“
And I think I got it...
slightly wrong!
Chorus:
I put this purity ring on my cock
and it’s painful like an electric shock
This ring should be inspiring
but it also makes me horny as hell!
I never, never, never had such a swell!
Verse 2:
When I drive my truck,
I just think of „fu..“.....functional underwear ;-)!
Can‘t concentrate on
my lonesome road!
Now it dawns on me -
how dumb could I be?
With rings size matters!
Who would‘ve guessed…?
It’s much too small,
doesn’t fit at all.
I want to be a chaste man
but it’s so hard!
Chorus:
I put this purity ring on my cock
and it’s painful like an electric shock
This ring should be inspiring
but it also makes me horny as hell!
I never, never, never had such a swell!
Bridge:
The day of the rehearsal dinner
my in-laws want to see
both rings, I think it strange,
but well, now it’s my family!
My girl point proudly to her finger
and I dropped my pants with glee.
I show them my swollen dick
in all its purity!
Suddenly the father says,
„Get out or you’ll be shot!“
The wedding’s up, the girl is gone
but I think this ring is so hot!
Chorus :
And I still wear this purity cock ring
[sing high voice] and my voice gets higher when I sing!
This ring should be inspiring
but it also makes me horny as hell!
I never, never, never had such a swell!
Ending:
I never, never, never,
I never, never, never,
I never, never, never had such a swell!